I've been doing some thinking tonight, while at work, since I have a lot of free thinking time there, that I may have to take a break from DBT for the rest of July so that I can have those Tuesdays free all day to work on the condo and pack. Barnes & Noble already gives me Tuesdays off (for the most part) and then for Lane Bryant they work that schedule off the BN one. That just seems to be the best way to get all the shit done that I need to in the next 3 weeks. And since a lot of people who would/could help me really can't because when I have days free, they don't... so I'm really going to be doing a lot of the work alone. I had one day where my sis and BIL, Kelcey, and
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
booklady50 came over to help, but since then, the other days that I've had open no one else could come. So I've just... resigned?... accepted?... the fact that I'm going to be doing about 80% of the work alone. Which is fine... I guess. I've just been really overwhelmed lately, since closing on the house and figuring out all the stuff I have to do now and trying to find time for all of it... it's just... ugh. Too much. I need the help but I really can't find it. Stupid retail crap job with it's inconsistent schedule. My cousin said she could help me the week after the 4th because she's on vacation, but most of that week I'm at work until close... so that won't work. I think I'm just going to email my DBT instructor and see if I can just take a break from DBT until August, when I'm all moved in and stuff. I just can't do it otherwise. Ugh. Okay. Off to... do something else. My living room is crazy dark since my lightbulb exploded, and I haven't been able to get to Target to get new lightbulbs. The uber darkness is hurting my eyes giving me a headache. And I'm thirsty.
EDIT 1201am 7-4-3-09 Nope... I'm getting a headache from the smoke that's coming from the losers outside. I don't think it's quite cig smoke... o.O
- Mood:
stressed - Music:Queen & Daivd Bowie - Under Pressure
I dug through my purse, grabbed my cell phone, and called 911.
The lady dispatcher on the other line was very nice when she asked what my emergency was. I told her I was behind an erratic driver and he was driving in and out of lanes and I was pretty sure he didn't have his wipers on. She asked where I was; in my car behind said crazy man, on Shady Oak Road and I gave her the cross street. She asked what the car looked like. Gave make/model of car and license plate. I give the answers all crisp and clean like, making sure the letters of the license plate are clear; I'm feeling all covert and cop-like, like I'm one of those World's Scariest Police Chase shows from SpikeTV. Thank God I watched hours and hours of those marathons when I was still at dad's, otherwise I wouldn't have known what to say! Ha! For a brief moment the road opened up to two lanes so he ended up behind me after that. Dispatcher told me to put my flashers on. Really? Neat! I put my flashers on and slowed down, since crazy driver was going super slow now, too, I didn't want another car to get in the way. In two minutes, a black and white comes in the opposite direction, then does a U-turn in a driveway. NEAT. Now we're at the cross-road of a major highway, and he's going east bound on said highway. I tell this to the dispatcher as I'm going across the highway on Shady Oak. She says it's okay, since there's an officer there; and as she said this a black and white turns onto the highway and follows. She thanks me for calling it in, and I hang up.
I'm feeling pretty damned pleased with myself. I don't know what issues the guy is going through, but apparently he shouldn't be on the road. Either he's just an idiot and can't drive, or maybe he's having a medical problem and he needs attention now, either way, he's going to get it now because of me. I get to DBT with no other incident, other than calling my sister to let her know about the cool thing I had just done. It's about 530pm when I get to DBT (DBT starts at 6pm but I like to get there early), about 10-15 minutes after I hung up with the dispatch lady, and I'm talking with some of the ladies there when my phone rings with UNKNOWN listed on the caller ID. Hmm? I answer it, and it's Officer Johnson, the responding officer to my call. Oh neat! He just wanted to get some more info from me for the report he had to file, like name, DOB, and such. He also told me that the guy was cited for reckless driving, and was very uncooperative with the officer when he pulled him over and was just acting odd. I forget how Officer Johnson had described him, but it was funny. Officer Johnson had even offered to help the guy park his car and get a cab, but he then turned really uncooperative and hostile even. And also the guy had a long record as well, so that threw me for a loop. What!? Well, good thing I called 911 then!! Wow. So he thanked me for calling it in, and I said "No problem" (really tempted to say, "No problem, Officer," but that'd be really cheezy) and then we hung up.
I then went into the DBT room and proclaimed "I am amazing!" Because I am.
Yeah. That was my fun little adventure for the day.
- Mood:
hah! hah! - Music:The Script - Man Who Can't Be Moved
A while ago I talked to
akoumi about places/festivals around the Cities I could have a little booth, and she mentioned a pagan fest in a park in Minneapolis. I looked into it, and woooo. Woo. Wow. I'm not sure that'd be the best place for me. These are hardcore Pagans. The Harmony Tribe of Minnesota has yearly festivals, and I checked into it... and wow. Just look at the site and you'd understand. I'm not sure I'd be the type of vendor (?) they'd be looking for to be a part of their little festival. And the Ren Fest here in MN wants period vendors, and I'm not really selling any Ye Olde Book Prints. Yeah. So, I'm kind of at a loss of coming up with a lot of places to sell my book outside a B&N and Borders, my blogs/sites, or throwing them at my friends. I guess, according to North Star, the bookstores have been hit by the recession and proftis have been down. They have been, from what we say in numbers at B&N over the holidays... but it wasn't like the store was a ghost town. The customers are a lot more picky about getting more for their dollar now. Well, I guess you can't say much about Borders.... since they're in bad financial straights right now already. So I don't know. Anyone have any ideas? And the book festivals I've looked at around MN and WI aren't really about selling, they're more about education. Argh. Maybe I could look into the Bloomington Book Fest, the one I went to last April... I saw an email about that not too long ago... brb...Well, I found the Writer's Festival, but it's in March. And Seal (my contact NSP) said that they could get my book in first draft form by April to send out to reviewers (which is another issue I'm having problems with), and that it could be out in actual print by August. I'm not sure that they could push the print date of my book up that far. I could just shoot Seal an email and see what her response is. If not.... eh. And with the whole reviewer thing, NSP will send the book to the big papers (Star Tribune, Pioneer Press, etc.), and I'm going to attack the Chaska Herald and the other local small papers around me, but then... what? I'm really really tempted to ask another huge favor of Patti O'Shea if she'd be awesome enough to read it and give a review? I mean, that could be totally kick ass... to have a New York Times nationall bestseller to review my book. Great promotional blurb and then some. But... I don't know if I'd be able to do that. But... hey, the worse thing she could say is "No" and then I'd be where I am now. And I know there's Armchair Reviews I could talk to, because awesomely they have someone (or someones) to look at paranormal romances---finally.
So yeah. Ugh. And I have to finalize my cover, which I need to talk to Kelcey about sometime. And I have to see if NSP will let me change the title of the book... now that it's Relic Chosen instead of Coven Wars. And apparently they (NSP) will be doing editing... but I'm having
jilrani look at it... so could I give them her version and use that one? And I want to redo some of the sexxy scenes a bit.... ugh. Ugh. Ugh. I can send all of that to Seal in an email and she can deal with it. It's almost 330pm and I'm still in my pjs. Yay for days off and sleeping in. But now I have to get ready for the day because I need to eat and get to Target before I head off to DBT. Blah. Blah.
- Location:reading this over your shoulder
- Mood:
confused - Music:Kiera squeaking
Yeah. The Geek Squad found 450 infected files. Dammit. Oh well. At least Kiernan is in good health, at $220 for the week it took them to fix him, he better be good.
So today, I just bought myself a really expensive Christmas present: Comcast internet service for the apartment. Someone will be coming Tuesday evening (5-9pm) to install. Yay! I'll have Internets for Christmas! When I sit in my apartment all by myself... yay... woo. Since I work 9-5pm Christmas Eve, I will be missing my family's holiday get-together in Blue Earth, 2 hours away. If I'd drive down there, I'd get there when people would be ready to leave. Dammit. I might ask my sister and BIL to come over Christmas Day so I can open presents with someone... *le shrug* Or I might send out an invite via Facebook to people who close Xmas Eve and see if anyone wants to just come over and hang out and stuff that night, so I'm not alone. I'm doing some pre-emptive damage-control for Xmas Eve. I have a feeling that if I'm by myself that night, nothing good will come from it. But please don't think of that as some horrid passive-aggressive shit to guilt people into coming over or whatever. If you can't/don't want to, that's okay. I'll have my back-up to my back-up plan.
Yeah. Had another snow storm last night. Made driving to DBT fun. Halfway there (and hour into my drive) I thought... maybe I should turn back... but then I'd be stuck in traffic for another hour going home... so I just decided to keep going to DBT. Took me 1.5 hours from Chaska to get to 394/Hopkins Crossroad. Yeah. Fun. Stupid people don't know how to drive in snow. It wasn't like it was really slippery (I did find some squishy spots of snow that made my tires move where they weren't needed) but the roads were decent, the snow was powdery and blew off the road nicely, and there were even tracks on the road for your tires that was clear pavement. Damn. If you've lived in this damn state for longer than 5 years, you should know how to drive in snow. Sheesh.
Well, gotta get going... have 5 million emails to check.... and 4.9 million of those will be crap.
EDIT 637pm
Totally forgot... when I was Best Buy picking up my puter, I went the ran through their laptop section real quick, to see if I could find anything decently priced to replace Vincent (my laptop I bought off calmingsilence and jilrani). I found a nice Dell model that was $499.99, and was super sleek and shiny and silver. Nice big screen, although the placement of the keys was off... but that could have been because of the odd angle of me v. how the laptop was on the counter. I wrote down the model info... where in God's green earth did I put it.... *rummages through purse*.... aha! Success. Dell Inspiron 1525 Laptop. Suggestions? Input?
- Location:redecorating the igloo
- Mood:
bored - Music:Plumb - Boys Don't Cry
Last night my sis, BIL, and myself rearranged my bedroom. It's very lovely, and clean. Hehee. I made supper, a thai curry shrimp noodle thing... that didn't really sit well with me and my sister. She thinks that she might have had a minor allergic reaction to the shrimp, since she felt her throat kinda tighten up. But we love shrimp and other seafoods, so she edited that to "cheap shrimp". Sorry! I bought my shrimp from Target's Market Pantry brand. :P I didn't feel too good most of the night, and I think it was the curry. My system isn't used to spice, and a few months ago I made curry cous cous for Jenni and Luke, my stomach didn't like me either. Oh well. Curse my Scandinavian digestive system! But despite minor food related discomforts, we pressed on with our main goal of rearranging my room. I also begged my sis and BIL to go to Target with me last night at like 730pm to get a new bookshelf, so I can put my overflowing manga and nonfiction books somewhere than in front of my other books in my main bookshelf. So now I have a nice neat, organized bookshelf and a lot more space in my room now. I went to bed last night, with my feet facing the shared wall with my amorous neighbors, and snuggled Kiera and slept soundly. Then I woke up at like 7am to muffled noises... oh God, not my neighbors again! I can't get away from them! But no! It was Kiera snoring! Yay! So I kicked her to make her move into a nonsnoring position, and I drifted off to sleep again. Hehehee.
And now some other updates...
Halloween was fun, got sent home 2 hours early Friday from work, so I had time to get ready for my George A. Romero zombie movie fest. And on the off chance that kids would come by my apartment, I bought some candies. Nope. So now I'm stuck with a big bag of assorted candies. Ugh. But I watched Land of the Dead and Diary of the Dead. Both were excellent. And to add to the funness of zombies, I had some Bacardi Strawberry adult beverages to help the night be more fun. But since I'm prone to panic attacks, and zombie movies tend to exacerbate those, I had to watch Futurama: Bender's Big Score to wind down from the zombie panic.
Saturday at work I somehow got erased from the schedule, so when I arrived to work Rodney told me I wasn't on the schedule, so I could go home if I wanted. Uh... nice. Could have told me that before I drove in. But since I was there, I decided to work. I needs the money. So Rodney gave me project time the whole shift, and I totally made the Cookbook section my bitch Saturday. Apparently we're doing a lot of shifting of sections in the Cookbook area, and making new New Arrival Bays in the cookbooks. So I did that all day. And now Ged is also my bitch because that was his project to work on for the weekend, and I basically did 85% of it for him. Rodney suggested I hold it over him for a long while. But then as Rodney tried to get Ged to take over the project from me, Ged bounced his duties back to me; which I didn't truly care about, I had a groove going with the project, and one more thing wouldn't matter. But then Rodney found out Ged made me do the thing he had told Ged to do, he frowned and said "The bastard" to me, then walked away. I giggled. Hehee. Love it. But now my legs have been hurting all weekend due to lifting stupid heavy cookbooks from one end of the section to the other.
And... that's all. Tomorrow is election day. I have no idea when I'm going to get to the polls. I can't do it before work, because I know I'll be late for work--although legally they can't be mad at me for being late because I was voting. And I have DBT tomorrow, so if I vote after work, I'll be late for that. But my DBT instructor did order us to vote, and if we were late, that's no big deal. I might just do that. I don't want to wake up any earlier tomorrow to stand in line for 2 hours behind some crazy Pro-Republicrat or Anti-Demolican. Ugh. Well, either way I'll be forced to suffer them. Hope your voting experience isn't too hectic. Or, if you were smart, you did an Absentee Vote, and avoid all the lines together. I wasn't smart. *le pout*
- Location:Over.... there!
- Mood:
accomplished - Music:Evanescence - Lithium
First I'd like to apologize for the cranky mood I've been in lately when I post. I know that DBT says you're not supposed to apologize for having emotions and stuff because it, like, invalidates them or something, but I still feel bad being a virtual bitch on LJ. I can imagine that reading me freaking out about something isn't what you all have in mind when you run across my post on your Friends Page. I've bee having weird mood swings, I dunno. But now I'm better. I'm going to post zombie stories! Wooo! Everything is better with zombies. And since notbamf was saddened that I was unable to post my last zombie story, I've decided to put links leading to my three zombie stories here, in case anyone missed my first one. And my last one, Cornflake Man, I've kinda hinted to some people at work that it's based on actual events. If you haven't heard my Cornflake Man story from work, let me know, and I'll explain what actually happened. Hehee. Enjoy the zombtastic fun!
[all these, and more stories, can be found at my writing journal: ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small}
draygns_lair]
So there you have it. My zombie trilogy. I might write one more before Halloween, I had an idea for it while I was bored off my ass at work the other night. Anyhoo... I'm done posting and stuff for now. Have fun reading zombie stories and such. I know they're kinda rough, and may not make too much sense in the grammar department, I wrote most of these after midnight. I think I finished Cornflake Man last night at about 4am... so that would be this morning. Yeah. But lemme know what you think. =^_^=
- Location:sneaking off through the portal to Narnia
- Mood: writing
- Music:Rachael Yamagata - Worn Me Down
(I originally wrote this on Tuesday morning... I'm not backdating it so it's not lost in the cyber miasma of friends' lists)
Because I'm nocturnal. I've always been more active and apt to staying up later than most of the people I know. My sleep cycle, circadian rhythm, whatever that thing is, is set 12 hours later than others.
And it doesn't hurt that I'm a vampire.
I just finished reading In the Midnight Hour about 10 minutes ago... and... ow! *le swoon!* So good! The last like... 40 pages just zip by and you're going "Holy shit!? How is this going to be concluded? This can't end this way! No no no!!" But it all ended good and it was such a good story. Now I have to go and get the second one in the series. And the cool part is, the series is set in Minnesota, because Patti O'Shea is from here. w00t! I'm glad I picked this for the Romance Book Club. I also got to chat with Diana, who is also in the club, and she said she liked it too, "a lot more than [she] thought [she] would." Hehehe. I do admit, when you read the back of the book, the brief description on the back is a bit confusing, so I understand the slight hesitance the rest of the RBC had when I showed them this title. But it was good! Woooo! Yay! So worth staying up 4 hours after I got home from work.
But I'm also up this late because I can't stand going to bed hungry. Why not eat something, you may be asking. Well, I can't. I'm 9 hours into my stupid fast for blood work to be done tomorrow... this morning... whatever. We're going blood tests to see if I have diabetes and some other crap, to rule those out as possible diseases/syndromes that could be causing my PCOS-esque symptoms. And for blood work fastings, they say you're not supposed to eat anything for at least 12 hours before your testing. Dammit. Sadly, more than one issue has the set of presenting issues that I have, so we have to rule a lot of crap out. Ugh. And the stupid lab work is at 845 in the fricking morning. Argh! Well, when I made the appointment, I figured that it's my day off, so I can just go get my blood drawn, and after 20 minutes of being in the doctor's office, I can come home and sleep for most of the day until DBT at 6pm. Well... now the lab work is going to be taken in 5.45 hours.... ugh. I shouldn't even go to bed! By the time I get to bed, and wind down, it'll be almost time to wake up again, and it would almost be better at that point to not have tried to sleep at all. Right now I'm way to revved up for some reason... don't know if it was the awesomeness of the book... nerves about the lab work... or... what. I dunno. Maybe I'll play some PS2 and relax... that's right folks! Yesterday after work I splurged and bought a used PS2 from Game Stop, and got a used copy of Burnout 3: Takedown. And it was even in the original case, not the stupid Game Stop default one. w00t! So I played some of that yesterday when I got home from work. However... sadly... the PS2 didn't come with a memory card... so all the awesomeness I did last night (including awards, special things unlocked, records made, etc) are all lost and I have to do it again. Ugh. Oh well. I'll get a memory card after work on Wednesday. Stupid, I should have asked if it had one, but I was dumb and assumed it had one in the box... and we all know what happens when you assume! *rolls eyes*
So yeah... that's about it for now. Yeah. Kiera is being psycho... I think she's not used to me being up this late. She makes the weirdest squeaky/chirp noises. It's freaking cute, but I don't remember ever hearing another cat make such noises. Odd. Oh well, suits me to have a weird ass cat.
Well... yeah... I guess I should get some amount of sleep. I know I'm just going to roll out of bed, slap some non-pj clothes on, and drive to the doctor in the morning---I ain't wasting time to take a shower, get properly dressed, and all that shit just to sit in a chair for 5 minutes while they draw a few vials of blood. Hell no. But I know that after my stupid fasting, I'm going to drive over to Perkins (within a stone's throwing distance from the doctor's office!) and have a big old ham 'n cheez omelet with hash browns and maybe a big ass muffin... or bacon... something like that. I hate fasting! I have been living off water for the last 9 hours! I'm starving!!! My Potbelly turkey sammich was not meant to sustain for more than 4 hours! Bastards!
*le sigh*
- Location:waiting for those damn sheep to show up...
- Mood:
hungry - Music:Kiera chirping
That might not seem like all that hellish of a day... but I'm really sparing you all the gory details. I don't want to explain all the shit that was going on in my head today... I know if I even start to focus on the details, I'll slip from my shaky calm I have going on right now. I mean... it was only four hours ago when I was eyeing my parring knife... Yeah. It got that bad. I haven't had serious thoughts of cutting in little over two years... and basically all today (since leaving work) I've been battling that desire to grab the closest sharp object... yeah. But, surprisingly, I was able to get over that urge and basically used what some in my DBT group jokingly call "avoidance techniques": movie, reading, cleaning, etc. If it keeps my mind from thinking too hard, it works. Some problems just shouldn't be faced head-on. I'm really quite proud of myself today; I used a lot of healthy coping skills and was able to pull myself out of the blackness I could have so easily slipped into today, I know I toed that line throughout the day, but I never fully crossed. And I'm most proud of myself with the whole knife thing... such an easy way out of the pain, a quick fix that really only begets more problems than it solves. w00t for me.
Amazingly, I was able to use some DBT skills during this most difficult time. I've been finding I use them without even really thinking about it, and only after the fact do I stop and think... wait... that was a DBT skill. Huh. I think those skills today helped me stay on the good side of the line. They also helped me see figure out: Yes, I'm on 6 months probation, but that's not the end of the world. True, it sucks how management handled telling me about said probation, and all the things I need to do (or not do) to keep myself in their good graces. But I can get through this. I apparently "turned it around" before, so I can do it again. I know what I need to do/not do, and I need to focus on those things. I can turn this shit around and make it work for me. Yes, I needed my time to cry and scream, yell and swear, but now is time to put that aside and think of a plan of attack so that I can keep my job and do better than I was before. This is a time for growth and discovery, not time to sink into depression and fall a part.
Well... it's after 2am and I've had one shitacular day today... so I'm going to go to bed finally. It's actually kinda chilly out tonight, so I should sleep well snuggled under my blankets with my Stuffie Monkey. And I have a lot more cleaning to do before we have the final installment of the Arrested Development-a-thon tomorrow night. Yay!
G'night all.
- Location:not where you expect me, but never where I'm wanted
- Mood:
drained - Music:fans humming
Who wants to go see Hellboy 2: The Golden Army with me on Friday? Or Saturday? It'll be fun! Wooo! But be sure you have seen the first one before, or else, I'll not share my popcorn with you. Hehehee.
Well... today is DBT... and I haven't really done my homework. I brought it here to Dunn Bros to work on it... but I'm being distracted by internets and stuff, and the fact I may have found the only seat that's right below the freaking air conditioning duct so I am now half frozen. w00t. I guess. I go from oven in my apartment to ice box in Dunn Bros. Huh. Whatever.
I really have nothing to really report... I'm just wasting time. But I think that after I post this, I'll go to Chaska.net and find out what it takes to get wireless in my apartment. I'm tired of planning my day and internet adventures around when Dunn Bros is open or when my dad is home/awake so I can use my desktop for interneting. Then I don't have to waste more money on drinks at Dunn just so that I don't feel bad about coming in here just to use the wi-fi (wee-fee).
Okay... that's enough crap for your friend lists. I'm off to investigate Chaska.net....
EDIT 431pm: In about 1-5 business days I will be receiving my chaska.net bridge so that I can get wee-fee in my apartment. Hot damnz!
- Location:Dunn Bros Coffee
- Mood:
apathetic - Music:whatever this crap is that's on in Dunn Bros
So I've been on a bit of a Lovecraft kick lately, and finally noticing how much stuff around is based from Lovecraft's work---mostly his creation of the Great Old One, Cthulhu. Like the Munchins game with the Cthulhu version, to other RPGs that are based in a "Lovecraftian World", it's quite amazing how much stuff I was missing before it was pointed out to me (I think by
lokein) that Lovecraft made up Cthulhu. Craziness. Last night I just finished The Call of Cthulhu, and I think of the eight stories I've read so far in this collection, that was the best one yet. That was really good! I want more Cthulhu! Hehehehe. And now to explain the title to this post. Well... most of you may know that I have a subscription or two on some online dating sites. And on one site, a young man named Marc introduced himself about two months ago. We chatted via email, and even IM when I was at my dad's. During that time, he seemed pretty interesting, and we had a bit in common (he likes anime, which is a plus for me) so things were looking promising for at least continuing to talk to him a little longer. Then we moved to phone calls. Ugh. Some of the things we talked about in our emails came to a startling light on the phone, and I realized that the things he'd be bringing to a relationship are not what I want in a relationship. After being single for two years and going through various forms of soul searching, I've realized what I was doing wrong in relationships and when "picking" boyfriends. All of the boys I've dated have had some sort of problem or issue---living an unfulfilling life, having a girl break off their engagement and drop off the face of the planet, having depression. And the list goes on once you focus too much on one of them. I had a weird notion of "saving" the boys, that I could fix their problems and make their lives better, and then through fixing their issues, my issues would be better. Uh... no, not anymore. I'm at a much healthier place in my life, and I deserve to have someone who is as healthy as I am. And Marc is not. I can identify with the hurdles in his life: being jobless, suffering from depression, living at home, not having a large social network... but I don't have those problems in my life anymore. I've taken the proper steps (through some trial and error on my part) to get over those hurdles and I'm moving on to being a healthier and better Amy. Marc... as far as I can tell, isn't really making an effort to get better soon. And frankly, I don't want to be pulled down by that. I shouldn't be pulled down by that. True, I had those problems, and I was in relationships with said problems, but the whole relationship was broken from the start on both sides.
I will admit that after I figured that out, I screened my phone calls and ignored Marc for a week or so. Ugh, bad Amy. Finally, Tuesday after DBT I resolved to just call him and chat, feeling bad for ignoring him and knowing that's not proper DBT skills. We just got done with Interpersonal Effectiveness skills last month, and I wasn't being very effective. So I called him and we had a good chat. Then once he heard I had a few days off this week due to the Fourth, he went into very passive attempts at suggesting we get together and hang out. I mean... it was just painful to listen to it, really. Well, I went into a more assertive mode, and I think he was taken off guard. Hehehe. I basically asked if he wanted to get together or not, and if he did, when and where, and just threw it back at him. If it was his idea to get together, he should take more charge of it. We finally settled on meeting at the Mall of America, and just see what happens from there. We meet up at the Mall... and... oh. Bad idea. I know I'm a horrible person for saying this, but he's just not an attractive person. Nonewhatsoever. And it's kind of funny (in a bad way) but I have a thought of "you don't quite match your profile picture". I won't go into details of his appearance, because that would be just mean, but needless to say... no. No. No. No. I know I'm not what people would call "beautiful" by our culture's stupid standards, or even "classically pretty", and there are some people would find me attractive (and have) so who am I to judge? Well, in any potential relationship, there has to be some level of physical attraction, and there ain't any here. I push that aside and resolve to have a good afternoon out with someone; because on the other hand, I'd be at home lazing about in my pjs watching movies or still sleeping and generally not being a productive human. We start walking and we pass by the Barnes & Noble, and he mentions he was looking in there earlier (before I showed up) and was looking for an H.P. Lovecraft book. (More cosmic connections! Argh!) We had during one of our phone conversations talked about Lovecraft and Cthulhu and such. Well, upon that, he was reminded that "[he] had something for [me]". Really? You brought me something? He digs into his pocket and pulls out a little one inch tall, plastic, green.... Cthulhu. He brought me a Cthulhu! So strangely cute that I had to laugh. Apparently the comic store he frequents was selling a whole bunch of the little Great Old One, and he remembered we had talked about it, and he got me one. Okay... he gained a brownie point there.
The rest of the afternoon passes... uneventfully. We walked around the Mall and talked... No. Correction. We walked around the Mall and I talked. I like to talk (which friends and coworkers can attest), and I need someone who can keep up their end of the conversation. With conversation waning, I suggest we see a movie, since there were a lot of movies out that we hadn't seen, and some had just opened within the last week. We pop up to the theater and pick Hancock. It was on my list of "I'll see if it others want to see it", so I figured why not. Well, we get up to the window to pay and I'm digging in my purse to find my wallet... and... I can't find it! Shit-on-a-stick! He offers to pay for my ticket, and once we have our tickets we have an hour to waste before the movie. We walk around a bit more, and I'm still pondering my wallet's MIA status. I resolve it must have fallen out of my purse when it tipped over as I was driving over and had to slam on the breaks because people can't drive on 494. One quick side trip to my car and we find my wallet! Wooo! Moneys! Now we can go eat. Marc only had $20 on him... being without job, his dad had given him $20 to do stuff. And you really can't split $20 between two people at the MOA and expect to do much; so I was really thankful I hadn't stupidly left my wallet on my chair in my apartment. We have lunch and actually have a good conversation... which is 80% me... and then go see the movie. Hancock was actually good. Not fantastic, but it was good. Maybe buy worthy when it comes out on DVD. Not Will Smith's best 4th of July opening weekend movies... but still good, a new and maybe risk-taking role for him, but he did a really good job with his character as he always does.
Then the movie is done and we walk around for a few more minutes discussing the movie, and I'm thinking... I need to leave. I really don't think I can be around him much more. So we finally part ways... and he motions for a hug. *le sigh* Okay. I give him a hug. Least I can do. We part ways and I'm basically freaking out on my way to my car, wondering if I'm a horrible person for thinking all this (see previous paragraphs) about Marc, and maybe I somehow unintentionally led him on? I mean, we just met and we've been talking for a while... no way are we dating now. God no. I hope he doesn't think that. What should I do if he wants to hang out again? Oh, Lord. Yeah, all those thoughts and more are buzzing around my head as I leave the MOA. But thankfully I had my new Katy Perry CD in my car, so I cranked that and sang along, which distracted me enough to calm down.
So yeah... I think I'm a horrible person. I know I am. I don't know why... but I am.
Maybe my Cthulhu-mini will climb off my TV stand and crawl into my bedroom and eat me. Put me out of my misery.
- Location:waiting for the hamster to get back on his wheel
- Mood:
guilty - Music:Katy Perry - One of the Boys
Didn't really do much today... well, I went to a DBT workshop this morning at the French/Three Rivers Park up in Plymouth, which was interesting. I am now at my dad's lounging on the couch (I need to buy a couch for my apartment!), watching TV, and putzing around on the internet. Yeah. I think after I post this, I'll go up to Target and get some groceries and stuff, then go back to my place and finish reading Animal Farm, and then work on a few more chapters of Rogue Angel: The Soul Stealer. Yeah, good books. I like Animal Farm and I think it's cute that the animals took over the farm, and the one horse Mollie was all obsessed over her hair ribbons and sugar cubes. Hehee. But I also see it as a good political fairy tale, and can actually be compared to what has been happening in our government as of late; the comparisons aren't just limited to Stalin-era Russia.
But I digress. Some of you may have seen this little ad-vert on my Facebook page under "Notes", but I'll post it here again, in case you missed it:
Who wants to go on a road trip?
And by road trip... I mean take a train with me to Baltimore, MD in the last week or so of September? This is going to be my big trip of 2008, and I have a lot of vacation to use up between now and September 30th. I was wondering if anyone would be interested in joining me? I was planning on going by myself, but then I thought: "How cool would it be to go with someone else and have one of those buddy road trip moments you always see in the movies!?" [Well, the last half of that is kinda optional ;)] So yeah, if you're interested, drop me a line. You know where to find me!
I guess that's all... I'm tired and just "eh" today.
.....
Who wants to help me buy a couch and move said couch into my apartment some weekend?
- Location:not where you think i am, but always where i'm not wanted
- Mood:
blah - Music:Evanescence - Lithium
Oh... and Thursday I'm talking to the Store Manager about all this "closed door meeting" crap. We'll get to the bottom of this. *le growl*
- Location:Dunn Bros Coffee
- Mood:
calm - Music:Dunn Bros muzak and the roaster roasting beans
The first draft of my book, Coven Wars, was passed from Lynn on to another coworker, Teresa, who is a big sci-fi/fantasy person at work. But she's also very particular of what kinds of books she reads, and is critical of them. So I figured it wouldn't be a bad thing for her to read my story, since she has read a lot of books and would be able to give me some input and advice and stuff. I was looking forward to hearing her feedback, and getting her approval of my book...
Was that ever a bad idea.
Apparently... well, here's a run-down of what Teresa said was "wrong" with my book:
- The beginning of the book switched too much from the main character's perspective to "instructional mode"
- The whole relationship dynamic between two characters was "way too confusing"
- There was a problem with two "evil/antagonist characters", apparently I couldn't really establish who was the more dominant/powerful of the duo
- I go into too much explanation over some things, but then not explain enough in other places
- I explain too much/go into back-story mode too much
- I am redundant when I explain things
- Apparently in the one sexy scene she did read, it was "the language you used to describe things was... too crude... the scene got too rough..." (although the kicker was this: "do you read a lot of romance books?... maybe you should pop over to the library and read through a few to see how they're done...")
She actually didn't finish the book... she stopped halfway through it and didn't even finish it because [quote] "I just couldn't do it anymore, I'm sorry." I just stood there... just... amazed and dumbfounded at what she was telling me. I just couldn't understand how she got all that from my story. And I tried to explain the parts that she wasn't getting (defend my whole freaking story, really) but it was hard to do that because we were at work (she also tried to talk to me while I was ringing up customers... I finally had to tell her to hang on a second so that I could actually work.). So... yeah... I was shocked with her response to my book. I think the worst part was that she didn't even finish it; I could handle the criticism of the actual parts of the story... I can work on cutting out some redundant parts or work on explaining this'n'that... but she didn't even read the whole thing to get a good handle of the whole story. She had all these questions about character's relationships that would have been explained if she read the whole fucking book... and I couldn't answer them because I would have had to sit down and talk to her for a good long time and go over the whole book and my reasoning behind writing it this way and that way... *le sigh* I was really crushed after she told me all that. I was really looking forward to getting her approval of my book, since she is a big sci-fi/fantasy/romance person... if she liked it, then hell, I'll be published any moment, right? I really haven't been having a good week... lots of crap going on in my head about stuff that's just not letting me have a quiet moment... so having someone say such things about a thing that I have worked so hard for four years... it really hurt.
I talked to Lynn about it, and she said that basically it was Teresa's loss because she couldn't finish the book and maybe she had decided not to like it for some weird reason *shrug o.0* and that I shouldn't do any of the changes that Teresa had complained about until I hear back from North Star (of which I haven't). So... yeah. Ugh. Just not a good few days. But now I'm looking for 3rd and 4th opinions on my book, and I've been asking around at work to see if anyone would be interested in giving said opinions. I mean... really!? It's not as fricking confusing and poorly written as how Teresa makes it sound. But I'm also not just looking for people I know will give me a sugar-coated thumbs up on my story. Which is probably a good thing for me to have gotten the feedback from Teresa; so that I can work on some things and do more drafts. As Teresa said (not in a terribly tactful way): "I really don't want to hurt feelings, you'd probably have heard the same thing from a publisher." *rolls eyes* According to my coworker-friend Diana, Teresa is a hard sell---which I totally agree with. She is very opinionated on things she dis/likes.
So yeah... blah. But I finished reading this fantastic book, How I Paid for College by Marc Acito, which is a fricking hilarious book about "Play People", or as they were known in my high school: Drama Freaks. Now I'm reading Forget About It by Caprice Crane. So far it's pretty good, pretty funny. I'm hoping it's as funny and awesomely delicious as Stupid and Contagious. Reading helps keep my creativeness going, as well as a good escape from crap. Escaping from crap is good. Well... other than that... I guess that's all. I just wanted to just vent and mope about that for a second.
- Location:not where you think i am, but always where i'm not wanted
- Mood:
rejected - Music:Kelly Clarkson - Haunted
I think... maybe... Fitzgibinz is gone. I haven't been able to find him since I last posted about his appearance. Hmmmm. But he could just be very good at hiding. *shrug* We'll see. Although I think he may have a) died, 2) gotten eaten by one of the other fishes, or third) gotten sucked up into the filter (e.g. Finding Nemo). Yeah. Oh well, I've told the other fishies to start making more babies... except my guppies. I have 6 males and 0 females. And I think they're getting to the breaking point with their sexual frustration. The whole group of guppies are chasing after this one poor male, who I've nicknamed Grapey... *snickers*... and the poor guy tries sooo hard to get away from the other guys. But then he gets accosted by the mollies, and he runs back into the horde of the other guppies. Poor Grapey. And I need to get a new filter for the tank... the water's looking pretty skanktastic. And it could also stand a 2/3 water change. But I'll do that this Saturday when I have more time and devote to my babies. I need to take a shower (still!) and finish my DBT homework for this evening's class. Yay. I also need to go the bank and change over my loose change into quarters so I can do my laundry; go to the post office and mail off some belated/still within time birthday cards to friends; maybe get some gas...? I think I can hang off on getting gas for another day. *shrug*
Soooooo.... yeah. I've started my new Bargain Section comic. After almost everyone I know at work asking: "When is the new one coming? Is there a new one? Is this the new one? We need a new one." I've decided to come out of my self-induced indefinite hiatus from comicking to start assembling new comics for a new issue. Yay! *Muppet cheer* The new one is called Bargain Section: Playing House. And most of it will be comics about me and my adventures in my new apartment, as well as new fun work-based adventures with the recent holidays and weird-ass customers (because we all know there is never a shortage of those). And I've been slowly working on finishing the first part to Thessla Moon... and trying to find time to finish reading Rogue Angel: Secret of the Slaves, and get my ass in gear for Coven Wars 1. I have just over 6 months to finish that beast! Just too much to do and not enough time to do it! I should really just bring my laptop to work and type there. Screw work. Hole myself in the cash office and type. Get paid to write. But I guess that's what I'm trying to do here in the first place. Huh. I still need to email North Star Publishing to see where they are at with my manuscript! Dammit. Ugh. I guess I'm going to have to finish this up, get ready for the day (finally!) and head my butt over to Dunn Bros to check the emails and stuff before DBT.
Blah blah blah. Uh... yeah. I think that's it for now.
What? You're still here? It's done. Go home. Go. *shoos you away* Go.
If you can tell me what movie that comes from... I'll give you a free baby fishie!
- Location:Here.
- Mood:
devious - Music:whatever KDWB cranks out
So... its 246am, Tuesday, December 11th... and I'm up writing this LJ post off line with the hopes of posting it later this day at Dunn Bros while I finish loading things onto my new laptop. I finally got my laptop! w00t! I did a baby-sitting job for
jilrani and calmingsilence Saturday night, and they paid me with the laptop! I had put money into it via random payments for the AWOL iPod... and then they wrote off the last couple payments if I did a few baby-sitting jobs. Not bad, not bad. But that still doesn't explain why I'm up at a-quarter-to-3-in-the-morning writing this. Well, I just got done reading Rogue Angel: The Spider Stone, and it was so good! I had to finish the last 1/8 of the book. Maybe... 6-7 chapters..? Maybe? I love the style of Alex Archer's writing. It's very Lara Croft/Indiana Jones: searching for lost artifacts that turn out to be a source of untold power, fighting off the bad guys before they get it, solving puzzles and traveling to far off places while avoiding the bad guys, and maybe having a bonus romantic interest along the way. It's good stuff. But the pacing of his writing it what really gets me. The beginning starts with a prologue, to get you interested in the artifact with some background info and spookiness. Then the next 10 chapters focus on the main character, Annja, following clues and realizing that someone else is after the said item of interest. Then the next 10 chapters are more actiony, but still following clues, discovering more information which leads to more questions and clues to look into. And the last 5 or so chapters really just smack you in the face with action, fast-paced development of things all coming together and making sense... and it's like ohihavetoreadmorenowonlyonemorechapterthI have also picked up the 6th book in the +Anima series that just came out. As well as the 4th book in Bizenghast. Wow! Anime up the waaazooo! Hehheee. Yay for me! Hehehe.
So yeah.... I'm surprised I'm up. Really. It's 3 minutes to 3am... and I'm really not tired. I bet once I actually lay down in bed, then it'll finally hit me how tired I am... but not right now. I took my new anti-anxiety med tonight when I got home from work... about 3 hours ago... and it's supposed to make you drowsy (a little bit) and relax you. It's Ambilify at 2mg dose. I had a trial pack from my psychiatrist for 5mg... but that just hit me way too hard in the first 1.5 hours of taking it. I was really tired and could have curled up and gone to sleep right then and there (which would have been bad, since I took it about 2 hours before going to work, and it hit me hard right as I was beginning my shift... sleeping on the job was not an option). So then my psychiatrist bumped me down to 2mg, so now if I want to, I can pop another pill for 4 mg, which still won't be as bad as the 5 mg. And I still have some left of the 5mg, so if I'm really stressing and spazzing, I can take one of those and mellow out. Or use them as a less-severe form of sleep med... like what my Seroquel is/was for. Seroquel is the uber sleep med that we use to mega big bad anxious/stressor days/times. That stuff knocks me out flat in about 45 minutes. Hehehe. Yay for anti-psychotics!
Okie dokie... I should probably get to bed so I can wake up at a normal hour and get some laundry done, read some Rogue Angel 4, and get my DBT homework done before DBT at 6pm. OH SHIIIIIIIIIT MONKEYS!! I also have to make bars tomorrow for the DBT Final Session of the Year Potluck Dinner Thing. I totally forgot about that! Dammit. Okay. Yeah. Adding that to my numerous things to do tomorrow. So yeah. I should get to bed.
Check you cyber monkeys later!
- Location:Dunn Bros Coffee
- Mood:
content - Music:whatever is on the radio now...
I'm bored out of my brain here at home. It's snowing like a fiend outside (squeeee!) and I'm stuck here at home waiting for my car to be done at the mechanics. The coolant storage compartment thingy that feeds coolant into my thermostat/heater had sprung a leak, and it finally caused my CHECK ENGINE light to flash on last Wednesday. So today James (my car) is in the shop getting the stupid coolant storage thingy replaced. I got James over to the mechanics late (10am) this morning because I was stupid and stayed up reading Rogue Angel: Solomon's Jar until 3am. Oopies. And then I was rudely awakened at about 530am by one of the other people in my apartment leaving the building, slamming doors, and screaming, "Why can't you leave me the fuck alone?! Give me some goddamn space!... *slamming door*... And you made me forget my coat!" *slams door as he goes back inside*. I had to laugh at him. Apparently his anger from his argument with his roommate was so great(!!) it made him forget to put on a coat when it's snowing and 20* outside. Good job.
Then I got home, and started to put together my much overdue DBT collage project for tonight... when I check my email and see that since it's snowing like mad, DBT has been canceled. Grrr. Oh well. I guess I get to go next week for the final one this year. No biggie. So I stayed at home... waiting for my car to be done... and watching TV. Man... nearly 3 weeks without TV... it's getting to me. All I do at my apartment is watch DVDs, or read while listening to CDs or the radio. Not that reading is bad... but one can only read for so long. So yeah.
And now I'm hungry. And when I say hungry, I mean starving. And when I say starving, I mean I'm going to rip off my arm and eat it!. Ugh! No food in the house because all of mine has been thrown out or taken to the apartment! And I'm not going to steal dad's food. Whenever I get James back... I called the mechanics and they said that they just got him into the garage and were working on him, give it about an hour... I'm going to go grocery shopping on my way home. Or picking up a pizza or something... I need to eat! If I feel so bold, I may travel up the hill to Qdoba and get a burrito... I'm famished enough I could eat a whole burrito and still be hungry 2 hours later. Ugh. I'm actually getting dizzy from hunger. Never good.
But my head is warm because I'm wearing my new gray knit hat. Hehehe. I look like the writing end of a silver Sharpie.
- Mood: famished!
- Music:Brandi Carlile - Josephine
- Location:out back... taking a baseball bat to my printer...
- Mood:
aggravated - Music:Angie Apro - Cry
Everything's all fuzzy and almost in slow motion for me tonight. No, I'm not having another weird ass breakdown (which I have been strangely fond of having lately... *eye roll*). This totally awesome fuzzy feeling is because I signed my 12 month lease to my new apartment tonight and paid my first month's rent & deposit fees... and... wow. As of Saturday, two short days from now, I'll start my moving process to my new place. It's just... surreal... At times tonight I had to stop myself and say "Dammit it, girl! You've moved out of your house! What are you going to do!?" or "Uh... do I have to leave my house? This is my home..." or "Holy fucking shit! You signed papers and handed over a substantial amount of money for this! What are you doing!?!?" I would call that "buyer's remorse". But I'm not sad about this. I'm just... trying to adjust to this new exciting change. Like when I moved onto campus at CSP the first time... that whole new feeling of being in a new place and calling that home. Wow. I have my own freaking apartment!
Before and after the lease signing and stuff, I was making lists of what to pack first. I have a lot of little crap that's in the way of the big crap. Saturday I'm going to move my kitchen in first, and most of the bathroom. I basically can move in as fast or slow as I want, since I'm in town (only a mile from home), and I'm not being kicked out by another renter (that'd be... my dad). So... yeah. I have a while to move things over. And I need time to box up my books, DVDs, CDs, knickknacks, clothes, pictures, and personal affects before tackling the big furniture. My bed and dresser will be the last things moved in. Well.. maybe next weekend I can move my bed and stuff in. Then I can organize around that and get my bedroom situated.
*squeeeeeeeee!* I can't stand it. I'm so excited. But now... I have to change my address on a whole buttload of things: checks, license, work info, bills, car insurance, work insurance, various doctors' offices, DBT clinic... I think that's all for now. But still! I think I'll talk to the MOD tomorrow to see how I change that info. Not that I can't have my stuff defer back to home... but... I think I'd get in trouble some how.
Well... I have to get up kinda early tomorrow (no sleepie in *pout*) because I have an appointment with my shrink about my latest breakdowns and shit. And I need to print off LJ posts as proof, since I can't really describe them anymore myself. I needs to get to bed. I'll take pictures of my apartment (pre- and post-moving) and post pics of the finished Lair.
/me is pretty sure she won't sleep because she's too freakin' excited!*
- Location:still waiting to count those damn sheep...
- Mood:
giggly - Music:Carbon Leaf - Torn to Tattered
Today I went home early from work... not even two hours into my shift. But I got all the opening cashier stuff done, so that was a load off the opening MOD's mind. I'm not really sure what happened this morning. I got in my car and pulled out of my driveway... and just started crying. I really don't know why. I think it may have been residual emotional build up from last night. I'll explain last night a little later. So I'm driving to work, crying, trying to get it under control so I can drive safely and do my job. I get to work and just lock myself in the cash room and get my HC duties done.... while sobbing. I ask my MOD if I can go home, because my head just felt like it was going to explode (my ears felt [and still feel] like there's water or something in there, and the pressure was making me slightly dizzy, like my ears won't pop or something), and he said he'll see what he can do. Our five minute meeting rolls around (our little "Target Team Huddle" before we officially open) and I'm ready to lose it. I follow the MOD to the mall gates and tearfully ask if I can talk to him. He says yes, gets someone to cover the register for me, and I head to the back office. And he's nowhere to be found. I'm about freaking out now, so close to blowing my already-paper-thin cover of sanity for the rest of the employees... and I run into him and he says "You can go, Amy, I'll call someone to come in." I'm about ready to wring his neck, but I just get my coat and bag and clock out. I'm sobbing all the way to my car, and sobbing on the drive home.
I pull into my driveway and see my dad sitting at the kitchen table. "Fuck." I wait in the car a little bit to calm myself down, but when I get into the house, dad is downstairs. I hurry to my room, close the door, get into my pjs, and go to sleep. That's at about 930am... I wake up again at 2pm. *le sigh* I'm sitting watching Spongebob, eating a PB&J, and my dad comes up and asks if I had another panic attack. I just reply, "Or something," I'm not really sure what it was. Nor did I really want to discuss it with my dad. I just wanted my peanut buttery goodness. He suggests that maybe my early hours and new HC schedule is triggering this. I shrug and we let it drop.
Now what transpired last night. Last night... last night was crazy insane. Yesterday, Tuesday, was my day off, and I had a dentist appointment. Apparently, the dentist nurse helper chick and my dentist (who is super hot!) think my teeth are perfect and glorious. Yay! I go have a celebratory meal at Culver's, and decide to make some phone calls about apartments and making appointments to see them. I connect with a land lord who has a 1 bdrm in Chaska for $525/month, and we set a walk-through that night at 6pm. I'll miss DBT, but that's okay! I'm not going to pass up a chance to see this apartment! Then at 1pm I have a meeting with the new vicar at my church over drinks at Caribou. It was actually a good meeting, and we know people from the Concordia University system, as well as some people at Concordia Seminary. It was fun, and we had a good discussion about our frustrations with the church as an organization, as well as how to get more people in our age group to be involved at church. Good times. But that got me all hyped up for some reason, in a slightly aggressive position towards the church. Me and the church have had a love/hate relationship for a few years. Anyhoo.
I go home and get ready to go look at the apartment. I tell my dad of my plan, and right away he's all negative about it. He's not sure how he likes the location of the apartment in Chaska ("you might be in a building with all Mexicans or low lives"), and if I can afford it... blah blah blah. But I told him that I'm just looking at it, I haven't signed any papers yet, so what harm can it do to look? He offers to come with me, and I agree, so that he can see for himself, and also ask questions I might not think of. So we go and case the apartment building first before we meet the landlord, and just by looking at the outside of the place, my dad just dismisses it. It's an 100 yr old building, so it's not going to be that fantastic on the outside. All original brick, design; I love it and think it has character. We finally look through the apartment at 6pm, and I just fell in love with it! Such a cute little apartment! Not big, but I really don't need big. A nice starter place. It's just so cute! My dad seemed to have not be so ready to burn the place down, so we talk with the landlord, I get an application, and we go on our way. I'm just about ready to jump out of my skin I'm so excited.
Then my friend Phil calls me! Woooo! I haven't talked to him in a long time, so it was good to talk to Phil again. We had a good... damn, 3 hour conversation on the phone about what I've been doing, work, Fallcon, the new apartment hunt, my future trip down to St. Louis, his last year of seminary, his future placement, all that. Then we get started on my visit with the vicar. And my hostility comes up again, and we get into a long discussion about my feelings of faith, church, where my life is going, where my faith is... if I even have faith anymore... it was deep. We even prayed over the phone, and Phil prayed for me. It was powerful. Then we talk more about zombie movies and my zombie books, Christmas lists and stuff. Yeah. It was a crazy night.
So... yeah. That's about it. A crazy crazy night last night. And I think I might have missed my meds yesterday... because I was a day off my BC packet... so... hmmm. I dunno. Maybe that's why I was all crazy hyper yesterday. And weepy today. I know some of the things that upset me and would have caused me to cry... but I've been worried and freaking out over those things before and never had a two hour meltdown like that. I think I'm going to call into work tonight and tell them I can't come in tomorrow... I need to get to a doctor of some sort tomorrow.
Or I might fear I won't have a job to go back to. O_o
- Location:Twisted Evil Vortex of Evil
- Mood:
depressed - Music:Pussycat Dolls - Buttons
That's the best subject I can come up with right now. I'm feeling very much like a hermit right now. The last few days I've just been hiding out in my house, camped under my awesome blanket on the couch watching TV and/or sleeping under said blanket on the aforementioned couch. Ugh. Saturday I had RSVP'd to the positive that I would be attending a housewarming party for my sister-in-law (so weird saying that!) and her new husband because they have a new apartment and stuff. Well... Friday after work I stayed up late because I could... then Saturday, even with enough sleep and stuff... I just turned off the alarm and rolled back over and went to sleep. No reason to; didn't feel sick, wasn't in a bad mood (per se), I just wanted to roll back over and go to sleep. So I thusly woke up at about noon-thirty. Ugh.
And I've been meaning to return a couple phone calls and emails to people... and haven't. I totally had time to do that yesterday... but I really didn't feel like talking to people. Tuesday I have a meeting with the new vicar at my church, since he found me on Facebook and asked if we could get together and chat ("we haven't been properly introduced... I'd like to get together and chat..."). *le sigh* Hopefully I'll be able to go to that. But I also have a dentist appointment before that, so I'll be up and stuff. I've missed chiropractor appointments and that lovely appointment with my psychiatrist last week... I've just been... waking up, going to work, coming home, crashing on couch, sleeping, going to work, going to DBT, sleeping... yeah. At least I get to work and DBT. I know this sounds bad, but I have more leniency flaking out on friend-get-togethers than I do with work; I like my job, I like the money, I need the money. That's about as much human contact I can handle right now.
Ugh. Bleh. I'm tired. But I'm not going to go back to bed... I need to sort through Mt. Craptuvious II and see if I have to do laundry before work. And maybe read more Monster Nation.
*crawls back inside hermit cave*
- Location:buried under my blanket, away from the world
- Mood:
listless - Music:Colbie Caillat - Oxygen
